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WELCOME TO GRITOMATIC
The holiday season always means an influx of packages being shipped. In the past three weeks, things have gotten extremely bad. USPS tracking system shows packages stuck in distribution centers. Packages bounced between the distribution centers. Packages marked delivered but nothing is delivered. Packages become no longer traceable. Millions of backlogged packages in distribution centers and airport facilities. 18 wheelers that cannot load and unload.
Home World of Guided Knife Sharpeners
1. Always carry a first aid kit.
A first aid kit is the most massively vital piece of equipment for an interstellar sharpener. Owning one offers both practical as well as psychological value.
2. Don’t panic!
Sharpening is not rocket science. A PhD in Mechanical Engineering (Abrasive Technologies), Materials Science (Metallurgy), and Geochemistry (Petrology) is probably enough to start.
3. Two heads aren’t necessarily better than one.
The President of the Galaxy has two heads, but neither of them prevent him from engaging in really stupid activities. Mastery comes from experience.
4. Improbable does not mean impossible.
Any blade can be sharpened with any sharpening stone. Proper tools just save you time. Probably, years.
5. Life can, at times, be a downer.
If you think your sharpener's life sucks, think about a guy chopping his finger somewhere at this moment.
6. What is the ultimate answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything?
You know the answer. 42.
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